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 Most
of these books and many ethnic, parenting and adoption books
can be purchased through Alphabet Soup. Adoptive Mom, Susan
Sternberg is proprietor and will certainly answer your calls
and ship your favorite books to you. You may visit her shop at
2495 US Route 1 Lawrenceville Shopping Center, Lawrenceville,
NJ 08648 or call (609) 771-3700. Click on the Alphabet Soup
logo above to visit her website or e-mail Susan Sternberg at
alphabooks@msn.com.
You can purchase recommended
books on adoption, directly through our website.
When you purchase a book from Children’s Hope Bookstore,
Amazon.com returns 15% of
the purchase price to Children's Hope International,
which will be used to directly support our humanitarian relief
efforts overseas. Also, if you link to
Amazon.com directly from
this site and purchase any book, 5% of the purchase price will
go to our relief fund. If you would like to recommend a book
or have comments about this section of our site please
e-mail us.
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BOOKS FOR ADOPTIVE PARENTS
 This
is a wonderful booklet designed specifically for teachers in
pre-K through 5th grade in hopes that they can help with the
school adjustment of adoptive children. It talks frankly about
the history, image, child, birth parents and adoptive parents.
This booklet makes suggestions about what teachers can do to
help along the lines of setting tones for acceptance; accurate
general information; sensitivity to certain school lessons
(ex: family trees); preparation to advocate for the children,
etc.
This is an excellent resource for teachers. As the parents
of adopted children you may want to order a copy for your
teacher or school. The booklet costs $7.00 each. For those of you who live in
the St. Louis area, we have a copy at the CHI office you may
come in and look at, if you wish before you purchase.
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 This
is a book that should be read by every adoptive mother and
dad. Whatever the age of your child when adopted, whatever
the time you have already had together, Attaching in
Adoption is a book that will prove helpful to your
adoptive family. Deborah Gray
is a clinical social worker specializing in attachment, grief
and trauma. She has worked for 19 years in children’s
therapy, child placement, and foster and adoption counseling.
She has also been a therapeutic foster parent. In
Attaching in Adoption, Deborah shares her experience via
vignettes of adopted children’s behaviors. She explains what
is happening from the child’s perspective and then she takes
it one step further than most books of this sort. She offers
solutions that are simple, straightforward and have proven
effective in similar cases. She addresses the fears and
concerns of adopted children and shows parents how to help
these kids learn to become “family children.” Parents whose
children were adopted as infants will also benefit greatly
from this book. Behaviors which emerge in the toddler and
preschool stages are addressed and, again, specific solutions
are offered.
Gray explains how the
emotional development of adopted children differs from those
who remain in intact families. She tells parents how to
determine if the family needs counseling and how to locate the
right professional. Attaching in Adoption is a book
that parents will read and re-read as their children grow into
“family boys and girls.”
This is a great
book to read as a waiting parent as you prepare yourself to
recognize some of the situations you will face down the road.
After you buy this book, write your name in it in big
letters. In your enthusiasm, you will loan it to friends and
family members. But you will definitely want it back!
Mary House, CHI, Chicago / Great Lakes
Region
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The Lost Daughters of China: Abandoned Girls, Their Journey
to America, and the Search for a Missing Past
by Karin Evans
The Lost Daughters of China is that rare book that can be
many things to different people. Part memoir, part travelogue,
part East-West cultural commentary, and part adoption how-to,
Karin Evans's book is greater than the sum of its parts. Evans
weaves together her experience of adopting a Chinese infant
with observations about Chinese women's history and that
country's restrictive, if unevenly enforced, reproductive
policies. She and her husband adopted Kelly Xiao Yu in 1997,
and anyone curious about adopting from a Chinese
orphanage--which houses girls and disabled boys--will learn
about the mechanics and the emotional freight of the two-year
process. Borrowing an image from Chinese folklore, Evans
conveys herself, her husband, and their daughter as tethered
by a red string that yoked them across an ocean and an equally
awesome cultural divide. -- Amazon.com
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The Adoption Reader: Birth Mothers,
Adoptive Mothers, and Adopted
Daughters Tell Their Stories
by Susan Wadia-Ells
Adoption has always been a woman's issue. With eloquence and
conviction, more than 30 diverse birth mothers, adoptive
mothers and adoptees tell their adoption stories and explore
what is a deeply emotional, sometimes controversial, and
always compelling experience that affects millions of families
and individuals.
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A Child's Journey through Placement
by Vera Fahlberg MD
This book provides the foundation and
the tools to help professionals and parents support children
for whom the journey through adoption is a part of the road to
adulthood.
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Helping Children Cope with Separation and Loss
by Claudia Jewett Jarratt and Dan Rosenberg (editor)
This book offers step-by-step guidance
for any concerned adult who wants to help a child talk about,
cope with, and recover from a loss.
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Adopting the Older Child
by Claudia L. Jewett
This book discusses expectations for
those who wish to open their hearts to an older waiting child.
Issues explored include adoption decision-making and
processes, adjustment, and behavior modification.
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The Family of Adoption
by Joyce Maguire Pavao
Joyce Maguire Pavao dedicates her book The Family of
Adoption in part to her two mothers, who died two weeks
apart. "They both died of secrecy," she writes. "One could no
longer talk, silenced by her disease. One could no longer
think or remember.... I love and cherish what each of my
mothers endured and imparted.... I refuse to have secrets and
I work to change a system that perpetrates them."
As adoption becomes more discussed and less taboo, the
emotional road maps become clearer for adoptive families,
birth mothers, and children of adoption. The Family of
Adoption is a gentle, essential addition to the literature
that will help guide families of adoption along the path.
--Ericka Lutz Amazon.com
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I Wish for You a Beautiful Life:
Letters from the Korean Birthmothers of Ae Ran Won to Their
Children
edited by Sara Dorow
The author, Sara K. Dorow , February 16, 1999
A unique opportunity to hear Korean birth mothers' voices.
I consider it an honor to be associated with this
important book, unique because it invites the reader to hear
and understand the voices of Korean women who have made the
difficult decision to place their children for adoption. These
letters are both heart-wrenching and hopeful. In editing this
collection, I wanted to be mindful of the similarities of
birth mother experiences across time and place, but also
respectful of the unique context of Korea and of individual
birth mothers. But most of all, I wanted the letters to speak
for themselves--for adoptive parents and mature adoptees to be
able to interact openly and thoughtfully with them. I hope
that in the end this collection is both challenging and
helpful.
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A Passage to the Heart: Writings from
Families with Children from China
edited by: Amy Klatzkin
The author, Amy Klatzkin; amyk@alumni.stanford.org,
February 20, 1999
Writings from Families with Children
from China
"A Passage to the Heart: Writings from Families with Children
from China" began as an e-mail conversation among FCC
newsletter editors. Within a few months that conversation had
turned into a book of more than 100 articles from 24 adoptive
family support groups in the U.S., Canada, and Britain.
The quality, range, and depth
of the writing far exceeded my expectations. There's something
in here for everyone whose life has been touched by adoption
from China: adoptive parents, waiting parents, family, and
friends.
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Talking With Young Children About
Adoption
by Mary Watkins and Susan Fisher, Ph.D.
Current wisdom holds that adoptive parents should talk with
their child about adoption as early as possible. But no
guidelines exist to prepare parents for the various ways their
children might respond when these conversations take place. In
this wise and sympathetic book, a clinical psychologist and a
psychiatrist, both adoptive mothers, discuss how young
children make sense of the fact that they are adopted, how it
might appear in their play, and what worries they and their
parents may have. Accounts by twenty adoptive parents of
conversations about adoption with their children, from ages
two to ten, graphically convey what the process of sharing
about adoption is like. --Amazon.com
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Voices from Another Place: A Collection
of Works from a Generation Born in Korea and Adopted to Other
Countries
edited by Susan Soon-Keum Cox
This book is written by adult adoptees from Korea and captures
their thoughts and feelings as adults.
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Raising Adopted Children: A Manual for Adoptive Parents
by Lois Ruskai Melina
This book covers current adoption
research in child development, psychology, sociology, and
medicine, while focusing on the experiences of adoptive
families.
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BOOKS TO SHARE
WITH CHILDREN
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Mommy
Far, Mommy Near : An Adoption Story
by Carol Antoinette Peacock
illustrated by Shawn Costello Brownell
Although Elizabeth, a young Chinese girl, is secure in
the love of her adoptive Caucasian American family, she still
has questions. Why, if China is such a big country, wasn't
there room for all the babies? Didn't her mother love her?
Such questions surface in games with her younger Chinese
sister, in loving give-and-take with her American mother, and
in hurt feelings after seeing a Chinese mother and daughter at
the playground. Decorated in floral patterns and colored in
lush, velvety hues, the thickly stroked, realistic artwork
expands on the text while heightening the emotions it conveys.
Elizabeth's misgivings are met head-on by her adoptive
mother's reassurance, love, and thoughtful responses. The
mother's tender support not only reassures Elizabeth but will
also benefit other adoptees, especially those from Third World
countries, as it reinforces the efforts of all loving,
adoptive parents. ~Ellen Mandel From Booklist.
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Happy Adoption Day!
by John McCutcheon
Here is a
children’s book that focuses on international adoption
and shows a couple flying off to get their child and bring the
baby home “on that wonderful morn.” There is a song that goes
with the book and many people have found great enjoyment
singing the song with their children and celebrating their
family’s beginning. The whole book is a celebration of family
that is remembered each year on the child’s adoption day
party.
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Seeds of Love: For Brothers and Sisters of International
Adoption
by Jill Chambers(Illustrator), Mary Ebejer Petertyl
This book helps brothers and sisters of
international adoption work through their feelings about being
separated from their parents during the time of adoption. It
also gives parents fun and practical ideas for easing their
children's anxiety before adoption travel.
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Over the Moon
by Karen Katz
Katz has
written a book that is bright, happy and colorful about the
adoption of their daughter from Central America. It is
suggested for use between adults and children who have been
adopted in similar situations and emphasizes the “forever
family.” The book uses statements like “faraway place” and
“Forever and always we will be your mommy and daddy. Forever
and always you will be our child.” The birth mother is also
mentioned and is described gently as a lady who “wasn’t able
to take care of you”.
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Did My First Mother Love Me?: A Story
for an Adopted Child
by Kathryn Ann Miller
From Horn Book
In the issue-oriented book, Morgan again hears her birth
mother's letter explaining how much she loves Morgan and why
she made an adoption plan for her. Mediocre pencil sketches
accompany the overly sentimental text, which includes a long
afterword for adoptive parents that gives guidance on the
complex issue. -- Copyright © 1995 The Horn Book, Inc. All
rights reserved. -- This text refers to the hardcover edition
of this title.
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Feelings
by Aliki
"Children often have difficulty articulating emotions. That
fact is the underpinning for Aliki's catalog of feelings, be
they happy, sad, or somewhere in between".--Booklist.
--This text refers to the
library binding edition of this title. --Amazon.com
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Horace
by Holly Keller
Horace, a leopard, is the adopted son of tiger parents. Every
night at bedtime Mama tells him how he came to be their child.
Horace always falls asleep before the story ends. As Horace
grows older, he begins to wonder whether he belongs with his
adoptive family. One night he proves his own ending to the
story he has heard so often. Full-color illustrations.
Amazon.com
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How I Was Adopted: Samantha's Story
by Joanna Cole
Sam has a joyful story to tell, a story completely her own,
yet common to millions of families. It is a story of how
babies are born and how children grow, a story of what makes
people different and what makes them the same. Most of all,
this is a book about love that invites young readers to learn
and to tell the stories of how they were adopted. Full color.
-- Amazon.com
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Just Because I Am: A Child's Book of
Affirmation
by Lauren Murphy Payne
Midwest Book Review
The children's book Just Because I Am is an excellent
introduction to self-esteem. Easy to understand statements and
enchanting full-color illustrations invite young readers ages
3-8 to love and accept themselves. They learn to respect their
bodies and acknowledge their needs. They name their feelings,
discover that everyone makes mistakes and hear that it's okay
to say "yes" and "no". Just Because I Am is recommended for
all libraries, day-care centers, and homes where children
depend on adults for guidance and affirmation.
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The Moon Lady
by Amy Tan
On a rainy afternoon, three sisters wish for the rain to
stoop, wish they could play in the puddles, wish for
something, anything, to do. So Ying-Ying, their
grandmother, tells them a tale from long ago. On the night of
the Moon Festival, when Ying-ying was a little girl, she
encountered the Moon Lady, who grants the secret wishes of
those who ask, and learned from her that the best wishes are
those you can make come true yourself. Amazon.com
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Rechenka's Eggs
by Paricia Polacco
A warm tale of love and and the unexpected from the
bestselling author of The Keeping Quilt. Old Babushka is
preparing her eggs for the Easter festival when she takes in
Rechenka, an injured goose, who shows her that miracles really
can happen. A Reading Rainbow Feature Title. Full color.
Amazon.com
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We're Different, We're the Same
by Bobbi Jane Kates
Who better to teach young children about racial harmony than
the colorful crew from Sesame Street? Rhyming text celebrates
the racial rainbow, without which the world would be so much
less interesting and wonderful. Full-color illustrations.
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When You Were Born in China: A Memory
Book for Children Adopted from China
by Sara Dorow
An excellent book to read to your children
to help explain what their story was before moving home. It
discusses the social situation in China, why and how they got
to the orphanage and up to the point of being adopted.
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Who's in a Family?
by Robert Skutch
This equal opportunity, open-minded picture
book has no preconceptions about what makes a family a family.
There's even equal time given to some of children's favorite
animal families. With warm and inviting illustrations, this is
a great book for that long talk with a little person on your
lap. Pencil and watercolor illustrations. --Amazon.com
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PRE-ADOPTION BOOKS
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Adoption Resource Book
by Lois Gilman
(3rd revised edition)
An informed and practical guide to
agency and independent adoption, both domestic and
international and how they work. Includes state-by-state guide
to adoption agencies. Also information about preparing for and
raising the adopted child.
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Handbook For Single Adoptive Parents
by Hope Marindin
Information, encouragement and practical
advice on the processes of adoption for singles, as well as
financial aspects, life style changes, day care, and health
care.
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Separation
and
Attachment
Issues
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Adopting the Hurt Child: Hope for Families with Special
Need Kids:
A Guide for Parents and Professionals
by Gregory Keck and Regina Kupecky
Assists families in understanding
children with special needs. Provides insight and support
along with helpful ideas and suggestions. Very informative
authors!
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Building the Bonds of Attachment:
Awakening Love in Deeply Troubled Children
by
Denise A.
Hughes
This book
spells out some of the trials foster and adoptive parents may
find themselves up against with some concrete ideas to use to
remedy negative situations. The book has ideas and strategies
to help children with attachment disorders so that they can
have the ability to function in a normal life.
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Highly
recommended by one of our families... |
Separation: Anxiety and Anger
by John Bowlby
The
experience of separation and the ensuing susceptibility to
anxiety, anger, and fear constitute the flip side of the
attachment phenomenon. In an authoritative new foreword to
Bowlby's classic study, Stephen Mitchell (who gives resonant
voice to the relational perspective in psychoanalysis) bridges
the distance between attachment theory and the psychoanalytic
tradition.
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Attachment
by John Bowlby
Bowlby's
magisterial trilogy analyzes the impact of attachment,
separation, and loss, and this first volume focuses on the
critical role of the bond between mother and infant in
emotional development. Allan Schore, whose pioneering
synthesis of neurobiology with attachment research has shown
how the brain gets into the act, contributes a foreword that
catapults Bowlby's legacy into the new millennium.
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Toddler Adoption, The Weaver’s Craft
by Mary Hopkins-Best
Written by an adoptive mother,
Hopkins-Best draws a magnificent job of exploring many issues
never discussed before in adopting toddler children. It will
prepare you for every aspect of adopting toddlers!
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The Broken Cord
by Michael Dorris
A celebrated author gives his account of
how he and his family search for answers in dealing with his
adopted son with FAS. It is a heat-rending book giving you
much to think and feel about.
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The Primal Wound, Understanding the Adopted Child
by Nancy Newton Verrier
A very interesting book. The author is
very knowledgeable and insightful in exploring the process of
being adopted. Although somewhat technical at times it
addresses nearly every aspect of an adoptee’s world.
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Launching a Baby's Adoption :
Practical Strategies for Parents and Professionals
Midwest Book Review
Launching A Baby's Adoption incorporates
anecdotal material solicited from adoptive parents and
professionals throughout North America. Launching a Baby's
Adoption fills the need of single and coupled parents seeking
to adopt for information that can assist them in practical
ways to bring a baby into their families and into their lives.
Launching A Baby's Adoption is a valuable addition to the
parenting collections of community libraries and is "must"
reading for anyone seeking adoption as a means to enhancing
their family life.
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